All day long, I have been asking myself "Why is it so hard for me to just let go? Why am I so hard on myself?" And truthfully, I still have no answer. I have started this new path in my life of saying "NO" and it is killing me. I have resigned as the vice president of my schools education association and today I decided I am going to quit grad school because I just don't have the time to commit to courses. I just don't understand why I have so much trouble seeing that I already do so much and it drives me insane!
I teach full-time, I am a mother to Neela and not only a wife but a football coaches wife which means I do everything for Neela right now and constantly miss my husband. I am still involved with choir and praise team at church as well as listening to kids say their verses for awanas and helping with children's choir. This is still more than enough, right? Right? So why can't I convince myself of this? WHY!?!?!? Why do I feel like I need to be doing more when I know it is going to cause health problems. I'm just very frustrated with this process and feel like a quitter. Ugh.
Please pray for me!
Natalie
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