Mission Trip testimony

I am leaving for Guatemala on a mission trip in 6 days. For this trip, I have been asked to prepare a testimony to share. The testimony didn't have to be about when I was saved but about a time in my life that I had to rely on God the most. I know I have written a previous blog about my trials with becoming pregnant but this was the time in my life when I did have to rely on God the most. Also, what I talk about needs to be something the people in Guatemala can relate to and having children is just that. Below is my testimony for the trip. I would like open and honest feedback about it.

6 years ago, I was diagnosed with Panic & Anxiety Disorder. I was having panic attacks to the point of not being able to leave my own home. After 3 years of trying out different medications and going to therapy, we finally found the right medications for me.  Those 3 years were some of the toughest years of my life. Why? Ever since I was a little girl, all I dreamed about was being a mother to children of my own. Yes, I was ecstatic to find the right combination of medicine to help with my panic attacks but one of those medications would be dangerous for me to be on and become pregnant. During those 3 years, I had many family members and close friends who became pregnant and gave birth to healthy babies. I was very happy for them but every time I found out about them, I would cry and it wasn’t a happy cry…it was a hurting cry. I had tried at different times getting off of this one particular medication but every time I tried, I couldn’t function without it. I had come to the decision that I would never be able to have a child of my own and seriously began looking into adoption. In the fall of 2008, I found another therapist to begin seeing. She opened my eyes to the root of my problem and a lot of healing took place. As a matter of fact, so much healing took place that I was able to get off that medication and became pregnant in the Spring of 2009. Even though I was excited to be pregnant, I couldn’t help but wonder why I was able to do so well now without the medicine than I was before. The realization I came to was that it was when I stopped focusing on my wants for my life and more on what God wants for my life.  1 Peter 4:12-13, it says “Do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.”  Once I realized that what I was going through was not because God wanted to keep me from experiencing joy, I was more at peace.  God was trying to teach me to depend more on him and less on medication. Romans 5:3-4 says “we can rejoice when we run into problems and trials for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.” Today, I am proud to say that I do have a child of my own. On December 1, 2009, my dreams came true and I became a mother! Neela Kate Vaughn came into the world and blessed my life in more ways than I can explain. Every moment I look at her, I can’t help but praise God for allowing me to have such a beautiful gift in my life. 

Once again, please feel free to tell me what you think. 

Thanks!

Natalie